1988, Bantam Audio - Cassette

 

 

 

 

 

Anyone who has ever foreseen the ruin of America in bags of potato chips that open at the bottom while you’re trying to open them at the top or in scratchy tags on expensive long underwear will find Tom Bodett a companion in suffering who makes it all seem almost worthwhile.

From Wow

Among the thousand and one truisms that were hurled at us as expectant parents was one I especially wanted to believe: "You are going to learn the most important things from your children." It sounded so promising, and when accompanied by a smug veteran-parent grin, it appeared to hold water.

I looked forward to learning about these "most important things," but soon after our boy arrived I decided it was all a lot of tripe. If the most important things are pricing Pampers, holding tempers, and coming up with six hundred variations on the word "no", then I figured people’s idea of "important" is purely subjective….

…Let me establish here that there are only a few words in our boy’s vocabulary. "More" is the one we hear most often and can refer to anything from fun to food. "No" comes in a close second as he repeats it just about as often as he hears it. "Hello", "bye-bye", "Momma", and "Daddy" make up the rest of his standard casual conversation, and that’s all the words he’s got. All, that is, but one.

By far his most distinguished and seldom-used expression is the word "wow". He only says "wow" when something really impresses him. If Dad lets a frying pan catch on fire and juggles it out the front door into the snow, it’s "wow". If we turn around backwards on the way to town and hit the ditch at thirty, it’s "wow". If the house were to burn down around him with the Messiah whispering reassurances into his ear the whole time, I’m confident he would sum it all up with "wow".

My reason for going into all this, like I said, is I had occasion to hear him come to life one recent morning. I’d been awake for over an hour, but nobody else was up. I lay there silently straining to hear any encouraging sign that there might be people and coffee about. I thought about my day, a Sunday, and took inventory of the chores at hand. We would have to get organized and make the drive home. Once there I’d have wood to put up, a door to fix, a few letters to write, and some bills to pay. My wife would clean the house, as she does every Sunday. The boy would refuse to take a nap, as he does every Sunday. Luck willing, we would have a little time to spend together before Monday once again descended on our lives. All this was less than the stuff of dreams.

As I was lying there brooding, I heard my child stir. He rolled over – I assumed he opened his eyes – and said "wow". Suddenly I felt like a heel.

With all my training to "think good thoughts", "look on the bright side", and "take it one day at a time", I woke up to a near-miserable world. This little boy who knows nothing of optimism, saw he had a new day, and gave it his grandest praise. I learned something.

It dawned on me that this innocent little child was at the place I wanted to be. To wake up in the morning, take a look at the world, and say "wow" is probably about as close to contentment as a person can ever hope to get….

 

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